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Review:Secret Santa says:
Ho ho ho!

Well, this was a delight to read, let me tell you! I haven't read Marauders stories in a good long while, so finding this one was a real treat. You really went all out with characterizing each of the four boys in their first memorable moment at Hogwarts.

I think the thing that impressed me the most with this chapter was how you chose each of their voices. I could hear each one of them thinking out loud in four very distinctive narratives that not only gave us a colorful picture of their past and their present, but also captured the wonder, excitement and trepidation each of them had. Also, I think their voices showcased their ages and maturity levels superbly.

You wrote each character so well that I don't think the labels at the start of each section were really necessary. I bet if you took those labels out, we'd know who each of them were within the first paragraph anyway. That's a personal preference, but I thought I'd mention it anyway.

Another thing I really loved was that even though you wrote each sorting from a different POV, you didn't overlap the timeframe. It was like each section moved continuously through to the next. Yeah, that was cool. Sirius has so much pressure from his family to be who they want him to be. Remus has a lot to lose if anyone finds out what he is, and by the way, I love that the sorting hat asked him "what are you" and how he freaked out at that, leading into his whole internal monologue. I think that was my favorite touch of the whole chapter. Peter has a lot to prove and his home life is so heartbreaking. And of course, James has it all. You captured his privileged attitude perfectly.

What a wonderful start to a story! I can't wait to read more!

Author's Response: Hi Secret Santa :D

I'm so glad that you're enjoying Mischief Managed. The boys have big stories to come (especially Peter!). ;)

Really? Ah! You really made my day with that comment. For me, characterisation is the most important part of a story, ans so I'm trying really hard to get the boys canon. I'm so glad you think they all have their own voices and fit their current age.

I've been considering removing the labels - but I'm still a little unsure :P It's like removing the training wheels off a child's bike, I guess!

Thank you so much for such a fantastic review! You really made me smile! I'm writing the 13th chapter nowm so hopefully it'll be up soon!

Merry Christmas! Keira :)


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