Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:justonemorefic says:
Hullo! :) I've never read a proper Albus/Gellert, I believe, but their relationship has always been so so fascinating.

It was a bit heavy with the description, but there's this kind of detail that I love, where it describes something relatively mundane, but makes for the perfect image in context. Like the nuances of his actions: he folds it in two, not bothering to make sure the edges line up and an inverted sigh. I love how the letters are a routine and how they show how their friendship has morphed and his entire routine is almost ceremonial. There's a weightiness to it -- I recall a section devoted to weight, and that's sort of what I translated it to.

And I think there's something to be said of the way he watches his empire grow (I really like your take on a war tactician's map, with the red cloud; the details of maps have always fascinated me because they're so intricate). There is war, and then there are the letters, personal and otherwise out of place, and it's like both Albus and Gellert struggle with both sides in their own ways. Albus, who must have on his mind, the deeds Gellert have done, and then Gellert, who doesn't know how to write in a simple letter.

But he's the one with... all this grace surrounding it, with his shelves of carefully sorted letters, and when he begins writing, he thinks of the niceties Unlike Albus, he will not start it simply with the otherís name, and unlike Albus, he will have the grace to write in the otherís maiden tongue Ė English.

I love the line you ended his section with: Dumbledore always did long for power, for glory; he will at least consider the opportunity. because it's so arrogant yet reminds us that Dumbledore wasn't always the man we knew, and that Gellert knows him better than us.

I would say that there was repetition at the beginning that was overdone, as well as appended descriptions that sort of just reworded the previous phrase; the amount of description toward the end is preferable to the beginning, because I definitely felt the pace pick up as Gellert began writing his letter. There's some really great stuff here, so paring it down would make it stand out, I think :) It's a lovely opening!

Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 264
Submit Report: