Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:Roots in Water says:
Hello! I'm here in response to your lovely Holiday review!

Oooh- things are certainly speeding up! I really like how fast paced you're making this because it really works with the story line. A story with a lot more description would slow the story down and take away the sense of urgency that's so apparent here.

As well, I think that you did a great job here of characterizing Neville. He was definitely in character when he sympathized with Hermione. To be honest, I don't quite see how anyone could be truly furious with her when she did what she did with the best of intentions and out of emotional stress (though I do wonder if someone will yell at her later, out of frustration at the situation). As well, it was nice to read that he and the "old gang" had kept in close contact since the end of the war. His position as Head of Gryffindor House was a nice touch as well, especially since it allows him to continue teaching herbology, though I tend to picture him as the Headmaster (probably because of "Conspiracy of Blood").

But that arrogant Roger Davies... He really got on my nerves in this chapter. He was so arrogant and difficult... But I suppose that I should cut him some slack, since he didn't know about the Harry zombie. I do hope that the results arrive in time... I have a feeling that they'll be necessary in the defeat of the zombies. Perhaps there will be a drastic change in Roger's personality before then... Maybe he'll come into close contact with a zombie and realize the error of his ways...

I don't know if you realize this, but you actually switched POV midway through the chapter, from Neville to Hermione (starting at "The corridors of Hogwarts"). It's a small thing and the change definitely worked with the chapter since it allowed us to once again see into Hermione's mind. I do think that it's easily fixed (if you want to fix it): I would just include a section break before "The corridors of Hogwarts".

All in all, this chapter was thoroughly enjoyable and I look forward to reading more about the zombie crisis that seems to be developping. The cliff hanger at the end was very well done- have more zombies been created or has the carnage started?

Author's Response: Hi there!!

I immediately went and added the break there, I cannot believe i never noticed that I switched points of view in the middle of the chapter! *facepalm* Throughout the rest of the story I stick rather strictly to Hermione's point of view except for in a few places. thanks so much for pointing that out though, I've given you credit in my authors note for that!

Well, Flitwick is still alive, though very elderly, so he is acting headmaster at the moment. That's not to say that Neville won't get there some day :)

Writing Roger Davies was so much fun, I liked to make him just difficult. That was my favorite part about him :)

Thank you so much again for your help and this great review!


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 262
Submit Report: