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Review:Pretense Of Perfection says:
Just started reading this, and I think it's a very promising start. I'll be keeping up, and I leave horribly lengthy reviews as a rule. Fair warning :)


The very beginning sort of confused me a little bit..I'm not sure if it was two of the characters names being so similar(Evie and Em), or what, but I found myself re-reading this first bit over again to really understand what was going on.

Secondly, have you read the Georgia Nicholson books? The jammy dodgers reminded me of her writing, and I'm just curious.

I think Lily's character is pretty much spot on..I love how she seems to loathe James, although we obviously all know differently. I still haven't really gotten a "feel" for any of the other characters yet, especially your MC. I feel like the chapter could have been a bit longer, or perhaps contained some sort of insight into who she is or what she's all about. I look forward to seeing you develop her more as the story goes on, but I have to be honest and say as of now I just feel sort of -meh- about her. Her name gave me cause to worry at first too...as this is eventually a Sirius/OC ship, and she seems to be the main character, when I realized her name was Andy, I hoped against hope that you weren't writing about Andromeda Black. We all know they're cousins, although back in the day I did see someone write a fic about the two of them..hopefully not knowing that little fact, and aside from the fact that if you stick to canon they wouldn't have been in school together during his fifth year.

Anyways, I'm starting to ramble. I'll be reading through the rest of the chapters tonight, and I must admit I'm excited. Overall, your writing is incredible, I love all of the adjectives, and the "little things" that really make a story a good read.

Keep up the good work!!

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