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Review:Courtney Dark says:
Hello:)
This seems like a really cute story-Lea is super sweet and adorable.
I think you've done a really good job with the narrative. The way you describe things, especially at the orphanage is lovely, and gives you a great feel for the direction the story is going to take.
I couldn't help but notice (and please excuse me if I'm wrong) that many of the lines seemed to very similar to those in the original Harry Potter books:) Especially in the first chapter, when Lea is talking to Dumbledore, I was very much reminded of the young Riddle in Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. Of course, there's nothing wrong with this, I was just wondering if you were aware of it.
I think your characterization is really good, especially of McGonagall and Lea but I think it would be awesome if you put a bit more detail into your chapters, make them even longer.
You've made a really good start here. Well done!

Author's Response: Hey!

The talk between Dumbledore and Lea was purposely written to remind of the one between him and Riddle. Especially the "is it magic what I can do" part. Dumbledore gets all stiff because he's reminded very much of Riddle. I probably lean too much on the book right now, but I'm trying to make everything my own so I won't have to rely on it so much. I'm so glad you like the characterisation and narrative - that makes me so happy to read!

Oh, I'm so glad you think my characterisation of McGonagall is good because I'm so nervous writing her and many of the canon characters. I always fear I won't do them justice.

I have a rather simple writing style, and I'm still new at this, so I'm trying to learn how to put more detail into my chapters.

Thanks for the amazing review. I hope you keep reading! :)


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