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Review:caoty says:
Hey there, I'm from tag.

So I love Narcissa, and your characterisation of her is lovely; you've balanced her social and political situation with her more human concerns as a mother very well, and... aww. I just want to give her and baby!Draco big hugs, because the latter is adorable in this too, and I don't usually consider Draco adorable. So well done with that.

That said, in my opinion, there are things here which you could improve upon. Mostly, it's just sentence structure - it can get a bit awkward sometimes, such as with:
It was easily seen that the Order members were overpowering the Death Eaters.
I mean, I get what you're trying to say, it's just... awkward? There are more straightforward ways which you can write sentences like these, I think.

Also, your paragraphs can get quite big, which can be very off-putting for the first-time reader.

Anyway, I hope this review wasn't entirely useless, and I'll see you around. :)

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for reading & reviewing!

I am glad to know that you liked Narcissa in my story and found Draco adorable, hehe.

Thanks for the CC. I'll look into the sentence structure and the paragraph lengths when I do an edit. Your review certainly wasn't useless..

Tahnks!


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