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Review:Jchrissy says:
Hi darling! Sorry it took me ages to get here!!!

Okay, so you said that you just started getting back to writing. I was there a few months ago, bah. It’s terrible feeling like you have to retrain yourself, isn’t it??

I think this is such an awesome time to write about. The death of Regulus, especially through his own eyes, can just go so many different ways.

So, during it I was a bit unsure about how… smooth Regulus was able to articulate everything he was thinking during all this. Then the more I thought about it, I realized that I actually have no idea what dying is like. Obviously. And I’ve heard what you pointed out in this, that drowning is supposed to be ‘peaceful’ so it actually makes sense that he would be in his own little thought bubble. Kind of having one of those ‘life flashes before your eyes’ moments but it isn’t actually flashing. He’s being forced to really dwell on it.

I know it was just a small part, but I *loved* the discussion between Regulus and Sirius. Or the memory of the discussion I suppose. It just felt so perfect. Their reactions to one another, Sirius not retaliating but doing more than a punch ever could and showing him what he really was.. I always wished these two could have made up.

Then Regulus’s thoughts about Sirius and how he would get to live.. if he only knew what would really become of his older brother. You just really touched on a lot of sensitive issues, and did it beautifully.

The only thing I think this piece could use was more imagery. I’m not saying every piece should be packed with it, but in this instance when we’re in just the once scene, trapped inside Regulus’s mind, I think you can take it up a few notches and still be far from the purple prose territory.

All in all, a really awesome and intoxicating on shot!

I hope I could be helpful!

Jami

Author's Response: Thank you thank you thank you!

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