This story gets better with each chapter, so it was no surprise that this one was my favorite so far. As Remus and McGonagall were making their way to the Whomping Willow, I loved the physical descriptions of Remus's enhanced senses, the way that he can hear and smell the anxiety that the others are feeling. Knowing the story of how Sirius almost leads Snape to get attacked, I had a pretty good idea of what the "surprise" was that Sirius had in store for Remus, and you did a good job of portraying his careless attitude in the way that he delays Remus and McGongall even further.
The transformation was almost physically painful to read. You captured the agony of Remus's body being torn apart and reconfigured into Wolf in excruciating detail.
The bit about Wolf attacking the human clothing and tearing it apart was really funny. Something I've been meaning to tell you: this story is not only rapidly becoming my headcanon on the behavior and pack dynamics of werewolves, but I also use it to rationalize some of the bizarre things my dog does.
Poor Wolf. He's so fierce in his desire to protect James but the tree simply won't yield. I really liked the way that you showed the fight between James and Severus and filtered it through Wolf's point of view.
The way that Remus simply walks away from Sirius rather than exploding at him was great characterization. He's calm and well-reasoned but also insecure enough that he won't risk angering his friends, even when he probably should.
The conversation with Lily was really nicely done. You bring such a warmth to her character. She comes across as very genuine and caring, but also straightforward and inquisitive. I loved the hug she springs on Remus near the end as well as Wolf's reaction to it.
It's such a joy, being involved in this story. I'm very glad that you've decided to keep extending it, because I have truly enjoyed each chapter more than the one that came before it. Well done!
Author's Response: Dan!
Ugh, I feel horrible that it has taken me almost an entire week to respond to this review. I don't know why but all of the sudden laziness truck and then Pinterest was discovered followed by the comic con this past weekend. Haha!
However, I'm here!!
While JKR treats the whole werewolf thing as a disease and doesn't really dwell much on werewolves...I'm sure that they had some of the human senses enhanced. So I had to add it even though some people don't consider it canon. For me, Remus with better hearing, sight and smell makes perfect sense to me. While he might still look weak, I also think that he's a tad bit strong.
I know that you thought or still think that Sirius was a bit of a well...haha a non-12 word, but I had to do it that way because he was one. He's a reckless teenager that didn't think things through. The more I wrote into this chapter, the more I started to think of all the things that could've gone wrong for both Snape AND Remus. I seriously think that if Remus had actually bitten someone, anyone...he would've been expelled and his guilt would've driven him to just end his life. He's already on the edge because of his disease, if Sirius's prank had gone wrong...he would've gone over the edge and end his life. Sirius, the way I see him when he's delaying Remus and McGonagall is behaving just like a dog who can't wait to show you something! He's just too excited about what he did to not fully realize how close Remus is to transforming.
To be honest, out of the two transformations that I've written, this one is my favorite and most painful one to read about. I mean...can you imagine your spine breaking and re-arraigning itself? Sounds horrible, doesn't it?
You know what I find funny? I have never owned a dog in my life but I just love them. Ever since the Carrie Vaughn books and this story, I've been doing a lot more research on dogs and werewolves. You have no idea how many hours I've clocked in when it comes to werewolf research, pack patterns, wolf and dog emotions...it has been fun though! Wolf has slowly become a weird OC. He's Remus...but in a way he's MY Wolf if that make any sense.
Remus is afraid of exploding at his friends. He's been alone for so long that he just doesn't want to lose them. He is livid and has the right to be so but he doesn't allow himself to be mad. So he just walks away hoping that he can calm himself before talking to Sirius. And for that, I thank you for encouraging me to write that small scene with Sirius. Otherwise I wouldn't have thought about it.
Lily's character is such a hard character to tackle. You don't want to make her too girly, too tomboyish, too smart, too mary-sue...so I'm glad that she came across as a genuine human being.
Thank you for helping me with this, Dan! This story would definitely been labeled as complete with just two chapters if it weren't for you! Now Wolf is a nagging voice in my head and wants his story told before I dare to think of it as complete!
Until next time!