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Review:Gryffin_Duck says:
Hi! Duckie here with your requested review. :)

Bit of a disclaimer first. This was the first Remus/Sirius I've ever read. I'm very much a canon person in terms of ships (and everything, really), but I'm not opposed to all non-canon ships. I'll be honest and say that I'm not a huge fan of Remus/Sirius, but you made it seem believable to me!

I was hooked from the second section, where Remus comes home from Order business and Sirius is aloof. It seemed so real and haunting, especially coming from the section before. You captured both Remus and Sirius's personalities extremely well, but fit their canon personalities into a non-canon ship. I rarely see that done well, so great job! I felt really bad for both of them in that section.

I found a few tense issues in the sections after Sirius's death. The first few sentences of the whole chapter were in past tense, but then you moved on to present tense, and the subsequent sections were all in present tense. I do wonder how it would read if you did all the sections where Sirius was alive in past tense and the other sections in present tense. I think it might get rid of any time period confusion.

I was a bit confused with the time period changes. I understood that a time period had taken place, but I was unsure exactly what time period it was. All the sections with Sirius alive made sense, but the others took me a while to figure out. Again, I wonder if playing with the tense would fix that.

It definitely seemed complete! The emotions were great and I was really able to get a sense as to how Remus felt during the entire story. My heart ached for him the whole time. He's my absolute favorite character and I think you captured his personality wonderfully. If you do happen to play with the tenses, I'd love to read it again. Just PM me on the forums if you do. Great story! :)

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