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Review:kjp says:
Hey i'm kjp from the harrypotterfanfiction forums with your requested review.
I've got to say that your writing has great style and you thought about all the choice of wording perfectly something that others have trouble with doing. You made it seem like every word counted which is amazing.
Sometimes I got confused with what was going on, or where the story was leading and it didn't make sense (perhaps its just me) but it took me a few lines to realize what was happening something that might stress readers out and therefor stop them from reading.
Your characters were great, especially rose, you've got the basics down for her character and I loved it. Lily as I always thought she would be was a little too perfect. We didn't really get to know much about Scorpius which i'd be really interested to know about.
Overall the stories good, but i'd just make it a little clearer to the audience what is going on every time you change scenery . Other than that a excellent story and i'd rate it 8/10
- kjp :D

Author's Response: Hello, and thanks for stopping by! I'm sorry that my response has taken so long. I've been busy.

I'm glad you liked my word choice. The story was meant to be a little confusing. I definitely wouldn't want to stress readers out, though! Thanks for pointing out specifically what I could improve upon to make that clearer.

I'm happy to hear that you liked the characterization, too. The reader isn't meant to know much about Scorpius in this story. He's more like a background figure. It's the perception of him from Rose and Lily that really is more important here, or so I think.

Thanks for your kind review!


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