Okay. Wow. There is so much I want to say. Okay, breathe.
So I just found this story, and love it. I just finished reading it all, and was too lazy to leave a review for each chapter, even though I probably will go back and do it in due time :)
However, I want to make this clear. From here on out, I am simply discussing plot and characters. I am in NO WAY assessing your writing or abilities, because as we can all tell, you are FABULOUS! :) I'll talk about your writing later.
SO, Gwen. God, stop. SHE'S RUBBING OFF ON ME! Her personality is INFECTOUS and for some reason, I seem to get the urge to punch people WAY more than I should! :) I really like how unique she is, not your stereotypical OC who is perfect in every single way. I adore her inner-monologues, I can relate to her so much. Gwenny has a knack for keeping the mood and I enjoy how she interacts with the Weasley family. Vic being her best friend is really unique and I want to see more of their interactions. Also, I cannot wait for the wedding!! :)
I also think it’s interesting how she is in the quidditch position. I really enjoy that aspect, time with the coach, practices; it’s all very unique and original as well as very Harry Potter – ish :)
However, let’s move on to her relationship with James. I love Gwen in this story, so she sort of doubles as protagonist and comic relief. Right now, I find myself shipping Gwen/Joshua… *Hides to dodge tomatoes* I have no idea why! Maybe it’s because we haven’t seen Gwen and James behave in a strictly ROMANTIC, boy friend girl friend way. However, my heart gives a flutter every time James does something amazingly cute. (Which is like… ALL THE TIME!) So maybe I am caught up in everything, just as Gwen is! I have more to say on James/Gwen but that will be hashed out later.
Let me just say, that little scene where he stayed the night? PERFECTION. That was the perfect step in their relationship.
I was going to talk about James next but…. LET’S MOVE ON TO THE FABULOUS KAT!
Ok, is Kat short for something? Like Kathryn or Kathleen? Because the name Kat has really been bothering me… I don’t know why… Maybe it’s the negative connotation that goes with it, which I mean she rightly deserves… She is a total you know what! (I think you have to keep these reviews 12+) I will give her credit though; she certainly fooled me with her pregnancy scare! That was a very adventurous step in her character, and I applaud you, you pulled it off very well. Kat definitely intimidated me, and made me want to punch her for the way she treats James. Knowing she’s in it for the status infuriated me even more, because poor James was in it for the life of his unborn child, NOT for her. She didn’t deserve to treat him like that, this I agree with… HOWEVER,
I HATE JAMES.
PHEW, it sure feels good to get that off my chest. (This is where the part about not insulting your writing comes in. You have crafted him so WONDERFULLY, that you have ALLOWED me to hate him. This is in no way attempting to tell you anything regarding your writing. It’s me responding to this character, just in the way I just totally tore down Kat.)
Why do I hate James you say? Well lucky for you, I’ve decided to defend my answer… Before you throw tomatoes at me! :)
I hate James for a lot of reasons. I feel like he bullies Gwen… A lot. And that is NOT okay with me.
The ways that he makes her feel bad for wanting to spend time alone or with her BOYFRIEND is ludicrous! He cannot honestly do that without remorse when he turns around and leaves her in the dust when he has a girlfriend! I mean, REALLY!? That is bullying her, and taking advantage of her kindness. I do not approve, nor will I accept it. He is a terrible friend to poor Gwen and she still turns around and loves him.
And another thing! The way he just throws girls around like they’re pencils, I mean WHEW, I thought Ginny would have raised you better.
But in my last attempt at pushing him down, I remember all the good about him too. I remember how he does care for Gwenny and conforts her in her time of need. I remember how he is always there for her, and how he will hug her forever. I remember how they’ve been friends forever and I think he just not realized he was in love with her. I remember how adorable Gwen/James is and I just cannot help but make them my number one OTP and swoon at everytime he hems at her and every time he calls her beautiful or every time he accidentally sees her naked under a bed sheet and every time he is just plain old James.
And that is why I HATE James. Because even though he makes so many mistakes, he is so adorable in the end.
Here is our seg-way into talking about YOU my friend. You have the power of conveying all of those various emotions I just displayed. HOW COOL IS THAT! Your one story has changed my views on so many things, and has made me sit here for the last half hour and FIGHT to express them! It is a magical thing when you get a reader that is so passionate about your story, so BRAVO, I give you all the bragging rights in the world.
I am nearing my limit of characters, so if I run out, I will continue this review on another chapter.
You are very talented. This is a story that I sat down and read all 18 chapters without looking up. You captivated my attention, and I thought you needed to know that.
Now, things are looking up for James and Gwen. I could certainly see them together in the long run, but my question is what is going to happen to the all fabulous Mr. Healer? Gwen would never give him up! :)
If you have any questions on this I’m sure very confusing review, feel free to PM me on the forums :) I am going to take the rest of the characters to fangirl over chapter 18.
Omg, GWEN AND JAMES. I LOVE MOLLY, SHE IS SUCH AN INTERESTING CHARACTER AND I LOVED HER ODD RELATIONSHIP WITH GWEN. I CAN’T BELIEVE THE ENDING… JAMES IS TOTALLY IN LOVE WITH HER. I BET TOGETHER AT THE WEDDING! Update SOON!
Author's Response: I'm such a horrible person for leaving you waiting for a reply this long! This is like one of the best reviews I've ever gotten. Please forgive me?
Haha, I know the feeling, she does that to me too d: but I'm so glad you like her so much and think she's unique! That means so much to me ♥
Aah, Quidditch. I love the whole idea of it so much and I was so sad that there wasn't any more of it in the books, that's the main reason why I wanted to make her a Quidditch player ^^
Haha, no tomatoes. You can ship her with Joshua if you want, I can't judge you because he is dreamy, and wonderful, and everything else in between.
but James does have some tricks in his sleeve d: just wait for it (;
Yes, it's short for Katherine. I think I mentioned that in chapter 5? 6? In the scene where Gwen met Dylan the first time.
Aww, poor James. He will be hurt when he hears that d: maybe I'll keep it to myself. Haha, no, you're right actually, about everything you said about him. He is a bad friend, sort of, because of all that bullying, but he doesn't mean it like that. He thinks he's only doing Gwen a favour, but he will learn, I can promise you that d:
But I'm glad you really like him even though he has his flaws (:
And my writing! You're actually making me blush here! Thank you so, so, SO much for your kind words! They mean so much to me!
The next chapter is finally ready! So update will be here very soon!