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Review:Serendipitous_love says:
The use of commas after speech is normal, except in some cases I have been taught not to. I always was told that it’s only if it describes what they say, e.g. “That will be all,” he said, voice dark and dangerous. I hope that makes sense since I see cases where it is done wrong here.

Your image of Narcissa was perfect. You touched on how we know her with the splendour and how she has changed due to all that has happened. Like how you explain all that has changed you have done it in such a way that gives an image across to the reader without being too heavy.

The coupling of Lucius/Narcissa is not one I am keep on. I take them for granted but they aren’t anything special to me. You show the other side, the one hidden behind the front that they want everyone to see. In such a way that makes it possible- my favourite kind of piece.

Your characterisation was done well- in all fairness they changed but that was to be expected. I also love how this is set after the battle, which is explained, and so we can imagine it well. I don’t know what else to say but I hoped I’ve helped, it was really brilliant!

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing.

Yeah I tend to mess up a little when it comes to punctuation. I am working on it though :)

I am glad you liked my image of Narcissa. I am flattered that this fic of mine was your 'favourite kind of piece' xD

Your comments really made me smile. Thank you!

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