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Review:True Author says:
Hello! I am True Author with your requested review! =]
Beautiful. This was really amazing. Simply great! I have no words to explain how much i loved this.
Well, you asked me to review about reader's reaction, emotions, imagery and descriptions. so let me clear them one by one.
Whatever i wrote in the starting was my reaction! ;) I think this story leaves the reader stunned. This story successfully makes a sensitive person cry. as i am not very sensitive,i didn't cry but i felt really bad for Rose and when readers feel bad or happy for a character the story is certainly good!
I liked the way you created the atmosphere for your story. i was rather impressed by perfect use of words and phrases. This is really good at emotions. but i have a doubt. do you want to say that Scorpius secretly loved Rose? it's just a doubt.
Just one suggestion! Please try to make the summary interesting. A nice summary attracts the reader! for example, you can just mention the theme of your story. "Dinner was the same; the common room was too the same. Laughter and childish antics. Scorpius sat across the table like he always does. I tried to act interested in new spells, our essay of potions, the goblins' wars, but my mind continued to wander. I wanted to be alone. Physically and emotionally."
I hope this was helpful not harsh!
Your Friend
Ashwini =]

Author's Response: Hello! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

I'm really glad you thought this was amazing! I'd like to think I've grown as a writer and it shows through in the actual writing.

"Perfect use of words and phrases"? Oh wow, that's a wonderful compliment! I write stream of consciousness, so there's never really any telling what is going to end up on the paper - I rarely edit, so I'm really over the moon that you think the words and phrases were good!

That's a good suggestion, actually. I've always been an advocate of a quick, short, attention-grabbing summary. I think perhaps I should see what I can come up with.

Thanks so much for the review! I do appreciate it! :)

Shelby

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