Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:Ginny45 says:
Hi!
This is really interesting. I have read my fair share of Sirius/OC stories and they are all either from his pov and there is a real lack of emotion or it is from her pov and she thinks that she is the one. He will stop looking at other girls for her and they will live happily ever after. Not that there is anything wrong with those but this is refreshing.

You said that English isn't your first language but I didn't notice that when I was reading it. In fact the structure of your sentences is excellent. There are a few sentences like this one:
"Sirius smiled down at me before lowering his head and started kissing my neck, feather light kisses, barely touching my skin."
I don't think that started is necessary for the sentence. It flows nicely without it.

Your characterisation is gorgeous. The internal argument is perfectly done in my opinion and is truly believable. I am really looking forward to the rest and I think I will go read that second chapter now. :)

Emma

Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 422
Submit Report: