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Review:magnolia_magic says:
Hi! magnolia_magic here with your review! Sorry I'm running late...RL has been a little tough lately :/

I think this is a really interesting look at Snape's thoughts and emotions during key moments in his life. I can see the love you have for Snape as a character, and I think you've done a good job of showing us what was going on in his head.

My favorite scene is probably the first one, when Snape and Voldemort are talking. I think you did a good job on the dialogue, and overall I thought it was well-written. Also, my favorite paragraph in the whole thing is in that scene: Snape's reaction when Voldemort reveals that the prophecy is about Lily's son. The one that starts with the sentence "Snape's heart skipped a beat." I love the vivid description of his physical reaction to the news, and I could just imagine how devastated he was. In that paragraph especially, I felt like I was right there watching everything unfold.

I think you've done a good job with Snape's characterization. There are a few dramatic emotional moments, but mostly his narrative voice seems very understated, which seems to fit him. Despite everything he'd been through, he wasn't an emotional wreck all the time. Overall I think you handled his character well, and like I said, it's very interesting to get inside his head. I also think you did really well with Voldemort in that first scene. His dialogue was really convincing and seemed just right for his character.

The one thing I would love to see more of is description and imagery. Remember that paragraph I mentioned earlier? The thing that stood out about that is the vivid description you used there. I think some time spent on describing the physical as well as the emotional would add a lot to the piece.

As far as going full-circle with it, I think you do a good job of sticking with the idea of Snape loving Lily and promising to do anything for her. And I just love this line at the ending: "Couldn't help imagining red hair falling around the boy's face, rather than black." I think that's a beautiful way to show that Snape's love for Lily continued to the very end of his life.

Overall, I thought this was a really nice read. It's well-written, and I think Snape lovers should definitely read it :) Good job, and feel free to PM me if you need anything else!


Author's Response: Thank you for the lovely review! It was extremely helpful!
I definitely see what you mean about description and imagery. It think I got so into Snape's head that I didn't really think to show other things, as well. Which is weird because usually I over-desribe haha.
Thanks for all the compliments!
~cb ")

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