Hi Susan! Thanks for requesting - I'm here at last!
Oh man, it's going down! I love how you described the family as "pushing forward" like an army to defend poor Rose. (Lucky for her - I would not want to face this Scorpius Malfoy alone!) To be honest, based on what you put in your request, I'm not quite sure how to interpret this chapter. I seem to recall you saying at one point that it was a parody of sorts, and I certainly viewed the first half of the chapter as being purposefully over-the-top and humorous. I actually think it nicely accents the serious feel of other portions of the story, as you suggested. So no, I don't think more humor is needed - it's funny, but not so much that we lose the plot in the laughter.
I think Rose makes sense, too. Her personality seems more variable than, say, Lily's - after all, her sole aim in life doesn't seem to simply be finding a good match, aside from the way in which she's forcibly propelled toward it by societal customs. The way that she's concerned for Albus, plus the way she ruminates about her family's dark history, seems to suggest that compassion lies at her core. It's nice to see something deep in a world that's ruled by the superficial, so I wouldn't worry about her. I'm sure she appeals to other readers as well :)
As always, your imagery is beautiful, and I loved the way I could just watch the dramatic scene unfold (for example, with the tinkling of earrings and headdresses as everyone shifted to look at the scene unfolding). I still think the plot is interesting, and I also think you're doing a good job of tying in the familiar elements of Pride and Prejudice with the magic of Harry Potter. Can't wait to see the duel next!
Excellent, of course. I hope this is helpful!
Author's Response: Yay! Thank you for being able to stop by and review this new chapter for me! I've been very worried at the lack of reviews for it in comparison with earlier chapters, but I guess I'm to blame for not updating soon enough, and they've all gotten busy with other things. It is depressing (as I know you know), and it's led to me being very insecure about this chapter, not to mention the whole story.
For some reason, I really thought that the second half of this chapter, with Harry and Rose's conversation, had become much too dark, that the historical aspect was taking away from the atmosphere, which is supposed to be more romantic and comedic (in the classic sense rather than the humourous one). I'm glad to hear that my fears were unnecessary and that, in fact, the two parts of the chapter balance themselves out nicely. :) That's all I could ever want to hear! It would likely be overdoing things to include too much parody at once - it's a lesson that some authors probably should take to heart.
It was Rose's variable personality that had me uncertain - I don't want her to appear fickle or unstable, only human, rooted in both reason and feeling. You're right that Lily is the more straight-forward character - even in my plans, she doesn't stray very far from the conventional plot of early 19th century novels. But Rose, I want to make her a writer at some point, so she looks at society as rather silly, but she also feels intensely for those close to her (not for everyone, notably). Thank you so much for your assurances - it means a lot to hear them from you! *hugs*