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Review:shadowycorner says:
This one was really nice. The writing is getting better and better. There are some commas missing and some sentences are run-on, but since you're getting a beta, I'm sure it will all be fixed soon. After all, grammar is only a sideline to the writing itself. I liked the interaction between Theo, once again I'd just like more dialogue. For example, the reader doesn't really need to know what they ordered to eat, but personally, I was much more interested in the questions Theo supposedly asked Audrey and how she replied to them. There was great chance to show Audrey's attitude toward this stranger.

In the other half, I was really touched by Tracey's thoughts and confusion about Theo, but mostly about her daughter Audrey. I can only imagine how hard it is to be unable to be there for your kid when he or she needs it. But she needs to work and there's no going around that since she's doing it for both their sakes. It's a tough situation. You're portraying it very well so far.

Author's Response: I'm so glad that you think I'm portraying the struggles of a single mother rather well as I've never had a kid myself so its nice to know that I can protray it well enough! I need to go back through the chapters I had written during NaNo and fix the small mistakes and such that I'm sure are riddled in every page I wrote that month. Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review!

~Slytherinchica08~


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