Drue! ♥ Sorry about the small delay in reviewing this for you -- I had the best of intentions last night, and then got rather distracted by Star Trek. -cough- And let me say before I go on that your chapter image is gorgeous, and that I am quite jealous. :3 But anyway!
Oh my goodness, you talk about my originality! I've never even begun to imagine any sort of scenario like this one -- this is about as original as it gets. :D I love the premise of it, the idea of a next generation character meeting one of the Peverells, of all people! I wrote a short story about them a while back, never published, and ever since then I've been wanting a really good story that actually tells about them. I love that you thought to write this at all!
I think your take on that scene was really, really imaginative, too, and I only hope that we'll be able to see your take on Antioch and Cadmus's deaths, too. I think that'll be really interesting. :) As for writing in that time period, the good thing about it was that it did feel distinctly different from the 2022 section about Dom; there was a very clear difference between the two parts of the story. I'm probably not an expert on how people acted or spoke around that time period, but nothing seemed largely out of place or jarring to me, so I mean to reassure you on that front!
And now, of course, Dom's intended mission seems to have been blown off course by her clumsiness. I'm assuming that this is when she goes back to 1234? Ooh, I can't wait until she meets the Peverells! :D I get the feeling that she'll stay -- and I probably shouldn't assume this so early on, but eh. Or maybe Ignotus travels back with her... But how is she getting back? Look at me, all these questions and I've barely begun. :3
The only line that stuck out to me was this one:
To the three brothers, at first sight it appeared to be a Dementor, but as they looked closer at the figure, it no longer looked like a Dementor. -- I'm not sure what about this made me pause, but it seemed a bit... Hmm. I think maybe it was the 'Dementor' repetition? Perhaps you could change it, use another word or description in place of 'Dementor.' (Gahh, it feels weird saying that, because who am I to give you critique? I apologize for being an inarticulate bumble!)
A very, very interesting first chapter, though! You've set up the story and led right into its events very nicely. ♥ I'm intrigued! Thank you for taking the time to request a review from me!