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Review:Voldy Needs a Hug says:
Another beautiful chapter!

My favorite scene from this chapter was when Lindsey was reminiscing about her time spent in St. Mungo's after her encounter with Bellatrix Lestrange. You did an excellent job with regards to providing a vivid description of the scene. However, how did no one notice Lindsey was awake for so long? She was evidently looking at Sirius, if she could tell that his eyes had lost their usual shine, and so on.

Additionally, you used the analogy of Sirius being a taut wire previously. The repetition of the phrase immediately stood out to me. Perhaps try a different analogy in its place.

I thought the ending of this chapter was a bit weak and could definitely be improved. It felt as if you rushed through the final portion of the chapter. Take your time, provide some description, add a bit more plot, and include less of Lindsey's steady, ongoing stream of thoughts, which were beginning to become boring.

Lastly, on a very minor note, is that's any particular reason why the bottom half of your chapter is in italics, even after the flashback has ended? Just wondering.

Good job!

Author's Response: Thank you for the review, I'll take these comments into account when I do my editing. :) The italics were a weird formatting issue that I didn't notice till later. I'm not sure how that happened. Thanks again!

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