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Review:teamdobby says:
Got you for Pass The Parcel and I'm glad it gave me the chance to read this story :)

I love your characterisation of Neville and how he goes from being the sort of nervous goofy character that we know from the start of the series to a more confident person. This fills the gap between the fourth and fifth books perfectly because the fifth book is where we see this new Neville.

The relationship between Neville and his father was stunning. I could really feel the love and pride from Neville's father's in his diary entry. Also, I liked Neville's gran's stubborn sense of pride towards Neville too :)

The prompts used in the story were perfectly placed and didn't seem forced at all.

The only thing I have to point out is a few spelling/tense errors. "The journey home has been no different" should be "had".
"But I'll rather be driven insane..." should be "I'd"
And lastly, "What magic without a wand" should be "what's".
Sorry for nitpicking but they just caught my eye...

Very small errors aside, this was a fantastic, heartwarming story which showed the relationship between Neville and his dad and his growth of character. Well done! :D

Author's Response: So sorry for the late reply. But I got this story beta'd and all the mistakes you've pointed out are corrected :D Thank you so much for pointing all the mistakes out. It really helps :D

I didn't want to poke in all the prompts. True, it was for the HC so I shouldn't have fussed but I love this story and I didn't want to do anything bad to it :D I'm so glad you liked it.

Thanks you so much for nitpicking and reviewing :D These sort of reviews really help.


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