I just can't keep away. I wonder what animal Scorpius will transform into this time. Or whether he'll actually be able to give McGonagall her make-over. This is all wonderful.
ANOTHER CAMEO WOOO! ""My name is Molly."
I open my mouth wider to permit louder sounds to emit through my pearly lips, freshly chapped with stick. "Rosalie Weasley!" I cry again, although I am not crying. There is no physical wetness anywhere near my glorious cheeks or eyes or other organs that were assigned to my face during birth." Ew. I don't like the image in my head of being assigned certain organs just before birth. Ew.
I'M SPARTACUS! "I was meant to be Spartacus!" I shield my eyes, staring at my eyelids in vain and torture. "Inside of me, there will always be a tiny Spartacus wanting to come out. It asks my mother, but she resists." And his poor, lonely hands. I'll keep them warm ah3h3h3. Not in a cr33p3r way, just in a Beatles 'I wanna hold your hand' way.
PICK ME ;) "he tells me I require a woman for pro-recreational purposes!" My peers are looking at me and I am enjoying it immensely. If I possessed sideburns, burning both sides of my face with frivolous golden stubble, it would make this scenery all the more grand." and we all know his sideburns would be grand. They would be fabulous, with sequins and their own names assigned to them. They would have little side adventures with Mrs Norris in her bell-bottomed jeans.
"I pose, just in case. My arms are now bent at the elbows, hands behind my head. I lift one dainty leg in the air, pointing my toes downward like so." This man is a god, as he has already stated. This man could do the 'Venus leg wax' adverts and no-one would care. They would be entranced by his leg hair and swoon.
I NOTICED! "You have been wooed by me for all time, but you didn't realize it until you realized it, which is just now" therefore we shall be together.
Rose is attempting to seduce him again? Never! I shall be there to stop her with my many-cameo army, made up of both swooning men and women. This sounds brilliant. This shall be done. Yes. (I notice I have started talking like Le Scorp. I like this development.)
I love the way everyone else is so serious and normal like this happens every day: "Wish number one," she replies immediately. "Go die in a hole."/I graze a hand through my halo of curls, fluttering my eyelashes with voodoo supremacy. "You fight me, O Red One, but you want me. This is factual." I wish I knew someone like this.
AHAHAHA: "I wink at them with both eyes, so as to double the charm. "Give me your wishes, Weasley! I will see what I can do! We will plunder the hills with our kissing-of-the-lips. This is destiny." I'm your density - I mean, destiny. Oh 'Back to the Future', how you aid me in my wooing moments.
This line genuinely made me laugh out loud, much like your other lines. "Mrs. Norris arrives much too late. She was supposed to be my dueling second. I yell at her with our mind-speak that she is late." I am imagining Mrs Norris being sad about the tuna and it breaks my heart.
Why are you so fabulous? More so than Scorpius, and that is surely saying something.
Author's Response: When I read your reviews I had to go back and reread some bits of the story because I was like, "There is no way I actually put that in there," but YARR I DID, and there was much snerking. What does that say about myself that I snerk at my own stuff. I think I might have typed this story in my sleep.
VENUS LEG WAX ADVERTS LOOL. He would probably enjoy doing that very much. Except he would shave with butter instead of a razor and then put his feet in hats instead of shoes, yodeling about the prices of beef.
lool talking like Le Scorp. I noticed that on days that I wrote this story, I would go around talking like that, making flamboyant arm gestures. "WHAT IS THIS I SEE? IS IT A SPOON? NEIGH, IT IS NOT A SPOON. ALSO NAY. EXCLAMATION MARK. IT IS A TINY DUCK. I SHALL PUT IT IN MY POCKET FOR ALL TIME."
Baww, Mrs. Norris's tuna.
Thank you, Honnoh! But not as fabuloso as you~~ ♥