Amanda... two days late, bah. Stupid summer. Always so busy but so boring all at the same time. Anyway, I did like this chapter a lot! :) Regulus and Severus (the last two letters in their names being the exact same makes it sound so weird -.-) were a bit more friendly in this chapter, but you made the transition quite naturally. I like how the Marauders' nicknames weren't exactly common knowledge, but Sirius' cover-up was really quick thinking, so hurrah for them keeping their secret for just a little bit longer.
I agree with Lily being a Prefect. She certainly seems like the type, and I like the fact that Remus actually went along and helped her for once. He had to be a Prefect for a reason, no? And anyway, he'd probably want to make the Professors proud and stuff and something else to do with internal guilt. I also liked the action scene! I have a bit of trouble with action scenes, myself, but you did do well with this one. I also enjoyed the whole scene in Potions.
Your pacing is really good, and I barely noticed the three dashes in the middle, even though I use them myself and should have probably that they were right there. Still no mistakes, too! You should become a beta, or something, I bet you'd do really well. Anyway, thanks again for requesting, and I can't wait to read the next chapter! 10/10 - again :p
Author's Response: Hey again, Linn :)
I'm happy that you thought the Regulus/Severus interaction felt natural, and that you can appreciate my attempts to avoid cliches by not having the Marauders announce all their secrets loudly and proudly! Haha. I definitely wanted to preserve their brotherhood and not let Lily in too easily. I feel like her knowing their secrets is the mark of her being trusted very, very much by them, and we haven't quite gotten to that place yet.
Yeah, I figured Remus would have to have a certain level of regard for the rules, being a Prefect and a bit of a peacemaker. It's great that you liked the action scenes, too - I don't think I'm very good at writing them, but maybe I've gotten a little better. The Potions scene was one of my favorites to write; I think it's part of why I love Snape, because he's an academic and a scientist like I am. Potions always fascinated me a lot in canon.
Haha, thanks! I'm glad the pacing worked well, and the scenes flowed together. I actually do quick-beta fairly regularly, and I am working on beta-ing a longer story right now. I just don't take on too much at once because my plate is usually pretty full. If you ever need beta work, don't hesitate to look me up.
Anyway, thanks for another awesome review! I'll be back over to re-request soon :)