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Review:palespirit says:
This isn't the worst thing I've read, not by a long shot, but I'd recommend you edit your work a lot more (Style and description wise, not grammer wise). I know you've probably heard this a million times before, but show, don't tell. Being a Ravenclaw myself, I love the idea here, just as I'm sure any Hufflepuff or Gryffindor would. You're doing great for one of your first tries- Keep up the good work, and, please, take my advice.
Good luck!

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