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Review:Ashling586 says:
house up 2012 task two:
By the end of this chapter I was left with quite a few questions. What kinda of ball is supposed to be happening so soon? How did they know what the password to the Headmistress office was? Did they just happen to guess correctly?
I kinda of wish there had been more details. I wish I knew more about what their common room looked like and what her bedroom looked like.
There were also quite a few grammar mistakes that I noticed. There were times when you forgot to put in punctuation at the end of sentences, so the sentences seemed to flow together for example:
"I am actually lucky I fell asleep and had it not been for Dra-Malfoy I would have been completely oblivious to the moving train as it left.” Probably would have sounded better as: I was actually lucky. I had fallen asleep and would have been taken back to London if Dra-Malfoy had showed up to wake me up.
"Since when to I call him": the to should probably be "do"
When McGonagall is announcing the Heads I noticed that you forgot to put a quotation mark at the end of her speech, because I was a bit unsure where it ended.
Overall this chapter was easier to understand than the first and I think that you have a good idea with this story. I am interested in seeing how this will end up turning out.

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