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Review:Pixileanin says:
These are the moments that I always imagined had happened, yet I don't see that a lot of people have covered them in their fics. I'm glad you did this. It shows the Malfoys at their most vulnerable, where they question what they have done and at what cost. I love how this one-shot foreshadows Draco's future, Lucius' failings and Narcissa's strength as a mother. You used your five hundred words wisely.

I do have to say this: I don't mind when authors leave out dialogue tags when there are only two people talking. I think if you are careful to show who's talking through the words they use, then no one should be confused. And you did that. All the lazy readers who can't keep up with a two-person exchange... pfft!

The only tiny suggestion I have is to be consistent in the first section. You start out by describing the voices with the word "the" and then later you use "he" and "she". I think it would have colored the voices better by starting out with "his voice", and keeping that consistent. But that's a personal preference. I was not confused at all.

A lovely read, and congratulations for making the challenge work for this!

Author's Response: I am so happy you pick up on the foreshadowing in this. It really sets up how the rest of their life will progress. I actually wrote this hoping to be a bit tricking and make people think it was the Potters being disgusted, so it makes me happy to know that even being aware that it is the Malfoys throughout the story, it is still enjoyable to read.

Okay, I feel a lot better that you feel that way, because I honestly didn't see how it could get confusing with two speakers who both say very different things. I love that suggestion and am going to put it into place right now! Even if it wasn't confusing, I think it will help with flow :)! Thank you for that!

Thank you so much for this wonderful review, I had a lot of fun exploring their world. It's hard to imagine that just one decision could have so severely impacted a family, but it's also an intoxicating subject to explore.

Thanks for the review, my dear!


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