Hi Camila! Here with another review for you :)
I really want to know what happened in the 'Great Quidditch Incident of 2017'.
By now I am familiar with these characters, so I'll just stick to letting you know that everyone stayed true to their personalities as I read through this chapter. I already told you about the dialogue tag/comma stuff so I'm not going to harp on about that again :)
Oh, poor Minnie. Everyone's embarrassing (or, disgusting) her at the breakfast table! I kind of have this feeling - by James' blushing - he knows something a little more than we do. *stores in back of head* I love how everyone just was perfectly fine with adding their own two cents on how obvious all of their tension is to everyone.
Minus the time where Uncle Harry had to sit him down and finally break it to him that babies didnít come from the Great Hippogriff. - I loved this line. hilarious!
Nat was funny here, and I liked the little set up of tension between her and James. I love how you are taking your time with different aspects of 'relationships' in this story and you aren't just rushing off to get everyone paired off as quickly as possible. Though, I kind of feel like finding out all of the Gryffindors are scared of her really hurt her feelings, so I'm wondering if that will cause a change/push forward in her personality..
Matilda Ramsey.. made her sign a letter just to say she read it? God that girl is unbearable. Is she even allowed to do that!? I loved the jokes about how scarred Louis will be for life because of Nat.
Oh! So I totally get the reasoning for all four houses being in the same classes from one of your responses. It makes complete sense now so.. Yeah just ignore that I pointed that out :p
Dare's brooding over Calvin was very entertaining. I loved Minnie's eyelash batting technique (that TOTALLY worked) to get him to stop being so negative. I would love to read a patronus lesson! They're so fun. Although - following a little bit with Dare's brooding - I'm sort of left wondering if he could produce one :p
And Scorpius and Albus! I was so lost as to how they were 'flying' but the Thestrals was such an entertaining idea. I will feel kind of bad if Albus loses his Prefect badge over that! Keep up the great work, and Re-request! I can't wait to see more Dare and Minnie tension and Matilda evilness and everything♥ I'm going to be all sad when I catch up to you and have to wait for chapters!
Author's Response: Haha, all in due time. I'm actually considering revealing it in the next chapter, but if not that one, then the one after that. Shouldn't take too long.
Yay for consistency! And yeah, I've got to go back and edit things up.
The thing with Minnie's "friends", is that they always put their two cents in. Especially when it's not wanted, haha. As for James knowing something, well I'm not so sure. He may have been blushing because he was just really uncomfortable about the idea of his cousin and best friend going at it.
Bahaha, I couldn't help it. Although I have to admit, the Great Hippogriff wasn't exactly my idea. I read it in a fanfiction years ago, but I don't remember what it was called or even what era it was in. I just remember thinking it was hilarious and threw it in there.
If there's one thing I'm doing with this story, is taking my time. Which is rather obvious since I've been working on this for over three years now, haha. But you're right - I don't want everyone all paired off immediately. And who knows if anything will actually happen between them? And as for the whole everyone being terrified fo Nat - well, it definitely hurt her. But I think it's a little too early in the story for her to have a change of heart. She'll probably end up just being harder on everyone, but who knows.
Ah yes, Matilda Ramsey. She's quite ridiculous, that's for sure. Don't worry, it get's worse.
Haha, I also used all four houses in the same class as a plot device, but I'm glad it makes sense.
Of course eye batting would work - Dare's got the will power of a twelve year old boy. Oh, I'm actually really looking forward to a Patronus lesson. I just haven't figured out a way to make it work and be realistic yet.
Hahaha, the whole "thestral crashing into the classroom" idea came from my sister. I was stuck trying to figure out what to do next, and then my sister suggested it (jokingly of course) and I was like, why not? It actually helps move the plot along as well as adding some comic relief. She couldn't believe I actually put it in there, haha.
Thanks again and there'll be plenty of Dare/Min tension and Matilda evilness in the next chapter!