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Review:married to black says:
I enjoyed this first chapter. You really captured the personality and traits that both professors hold. From the words they spoke to the motions and emotions they expressed, I felt like you really stuck to the way JKR had built the two characters and wrote it extremely well. I have read a piece of yours before, so I knew to expect great writing from you once more and fail me, you have not! You know how to convey emotions of the mood well and your descriptions are wonderful; I am able to imagine the happenings in the story in my head.

I found your grammar and spelling marvelous. The only thing I noticed was that you had accidentally started off this quote with an apostrophe rather than a quotation mark:

'As I've said before, Minerva, there are two sides to every war. It's time for us to fight back."

That's the only nitpick that I found. But really, great first chapter. I love Fawkes! And the quotes in the story... they are great and well thought-out. Really. Articulate words just as I would expect from the two. :)

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked this chapter! Dumbledore and McGonagall are notoriously difficult to write, I think, so it was a definite challenge to try and make sure they were in-character as much as I could possibly write them.

Aw, thanks. Emotion is definitely one of my strengths as a writer so I try to use that to my advantage as much as I can.

Oops! Thanks for noticing that mistake. I'll have to go back and fix that.

Thank you for your review - I'm so happy you loved this. I hope to see you back for more. :)


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