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Review:dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap says:
Finally! To be back with Severus and Avrille. I have been trying to read this chapter for the past two weeks but people keep interrupting me and I want to read a few chapters, not one, since I have so many left!

I skipped lunch before my first observation with him and instead spent over an hour filling and arranging the student store cupboard so that it was perfect.

^ I feel like Severus will find something to say about this. Something negative of course. I don't think he would appreciate her trying to go out of his way to impress him because it comes off more that she's trying to show him that she's...better than him? She can do his job. He's replaceable. I got all of that out of one sentence. That has never happened to me before with fan fiction. Nice job!

Of course I could be wrong, but still, I enjoy analyzing things.

She also asked me about my former schools, with certainly more professional interest than the students, though she too was dying to know how I had survived with no boys around. She made quite the comical face when I remarked that I had always been too busy with work to really notice it.

^ This made me laugh because at any age, many woman still go on and on about 'boys' or men rather. I know, since I was thirteen maybe, my Aunts, ranging from their forties to their sixties would ask, "Any boys? Any guys? Any men?" ('Men' would be used once I got a little older) And whenever I would say no they would give me this face like 'what's the point of going to school then'? What a world.

I wasn't sure if I was simply being paranoid, but it felt like Lockhart had been everywhere I was the past few days.

You know I love Lockhart so I can't complain but he really has been in the story quite a lot. I wonder. Is he trying to make a move on dear Avrille? That would be funny for me but not for her. I suppose 'pretty' people need to be with 'pretty' people and Lockhart is so pretty.

I had only completed the first two weeks of my ten-month apprenticeship, and I had the most embarrassingly huge crush on Professor Snape.

^ Loved that entire part. I couldn't copy and paste my favorite lines because there were so many and I didn't want to stop because I wanted to know what was going to happen next.

I'm glad that she realizes it now because it is very obvious she has a crush on him but then again I know her thoughts. I feel like she might dial it down though, try to not impress him as much as she has been trying to and therefore she will end up impressing him without actually trying.

I liked the fact that his smile went away quickly and he left soon after because you could have gone the more cliche way where they then continue to discuss the book into the night, skipping lunch and dinner or whatever meal and then having to rush off together for food making them spend a large portion of the day together. I'm kind of amazed because I know you didn't read any fan fiction when you wrote the entire story. I guess this is what happens when you donít know what else is out there. You have managed to steer clear of these cliches I see over and over again.

I was so glad to see some Hagrid! You kept him in character and I liked how you made him someone that she would want to talk to and confide in. Hagrid has always had that warm nature about him that I love. Oh and him not wanting to gossip! Psh! Hagrid always had loose lips.

Author's Response: HI hi hi!! Oh, I'm so excited you're back! I know you were really busy with Camp NaNo, however. How's that going?! No way I could even attempt it this month, but maybe August. When I have a minute from crazy toddler-land, I'm dying to check out your Dudley story because it looks so original. It's been taunting me through the interwebs to come and read for weeks now, but I was really pushing to get my next chapter written in the bits of free time I had when the bug bit me.

Aanyway... I totally should have thought of what you did with Severus being annoyed with the store cupboard thing. I guess maybe I figured he wouldn't have even noticed? I guess he assumed she was so competent, that it would be fine. He'd probably just want to get the whole thing over with as soon as possible with as little interaction with her or checking up on her as possible. But wow, you really do have some interesting analyses there. I'm constantly always doing the same thing.

Ba ha ha...your aunts sound awesome. I guess I didn't get too much of that since my husband and I have been together since we were 17. I mostly got the very annoying, "Are you still with the same boyfriend?" question which always made me mad because we knew we were going to get married. Ugh, some people!

Your Lockhart question is a good one, and I won't answer it right now ;) You'll find out for yourself pretty soon! Lockhart really is just so pretty. He really probably assumes Avrille would want to hook up with him since, like you said, pretty people just go together. But in my mind, Severus is pretty too. At least he would be if he put on some eyeliner and really rocked the goth vibe he's got going on (though he'd probably curse me for suggesting something so inane).

I'm so glad you liked that part at the end!! I really think that's one of my top 5 favorite scenes I wrote in this story. Severus's smile was inspired by a Japanese rock singer I love who always has this really serious, glaring expression in photos. I saw a behind the scenes thing once where he smiled and it was like: O_O. It totally transformed him into just this nice guy. I also loved writing Hagrid. He's one of my favorite characters in the books. He isn't in this story too much anymore, so I think I need to make a better effort to bring him into the sequel. He's like everyone's best BIG brother. It just might be a little tough with him being so busy with Grawp. We'll see.

Thanks so much for your compliments. I really do think it helped not reading any fan fiction before writing this. Yes, it helped me avoid cliches for the most part, but I think I also would have been very intimidated by the level of talent out there. It's always better to write for yourself and not because you're competing with someone, you know? Thanks again! Ugh, SO many more reviews of yours to read! I was supposed to be working on my new chapter but. TOO TEMPTING TO READ THEM! ~Renny


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