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Review:ImagineHarmony says:
Hello! VividImagination from the forums at your service ;)
Honestly, I really, really loved this chapter!

The plot (this chapter) was very simple, very realistic and believable for a girl who is very strong. I think you portrayed her very good, you didn't make Roxanne like the usual characters, and I think you'll be able to do a good story because you have a good plot (this prologue is perfect as a prologue, it has suspense!) and great characters to base it on.

The flow is perfect, you weren't lagging at any points. I think you should add a bit more descriptive details in the next later chapters, but that's just me, so don't mind that if you don't want it. I think though the paragraph above "Then realization hit me." could be separated with more details in it, such as like sometimes answering the rhetorical question.

I haven't noticed any grammar mistakes except for 'realisation', the S should be a Z :) (or is it spelled with an S in other countries out of UK?)

I read the other reviews and I agree with Julie, try as much as to flesh the characters out because the next chapters, the characters are very important!

Overall this is a good start, so keep it up :) I can't wait to read more!
Do keep requesting :P

-IH

Author's Response: Hi thanks for the review :)

I'm glad you found the plot realistic and believable as that it's very hard to write. So thank you :) I'm also glad you thought there was suspense in this prologue as I wanted people to be left with a lot of unanswered questions so they would come back to find out :)

I'll put the Z back in realization when I look through it. Probably the middle of next month :) and I'll look through that too and add more to where you'd suggest. Thank you for pointing that out!!!

Yeah I know I need to tread carefully especially writing a story where my MC is pregnant. I'm trying me hardest not to make this story cliche and hopefully if I built a good enough characters it won't turn out in such a way.

I feel so much pressure to not slipped onto the cliche route haha

Thanks you for reviewing! It helped a lot and I shall be back to re-request for the next chapter :)


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