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Review:hedwigs_theme says:
Hello again!

Firstly, I just want to say that I love your last sentence "Let the caged bired fly free", It's so pretty!

Flashbacks~ These aren't too confusing. I know it's hard as I use plenty of flashbacks when I write as well. Just be careful on the amount you use because if use too many more in one chapter your readers could get bored and you wouldn't want that :(

The characterisation of Albus was better. You gave the reader a better understanding of his personality changes and how much of a jerk he became.

A great 2nd chapter :)

ht 8.5/10

Author's Response: Auughhh!! Thank you for loving my last sentence!! I really wanted each chapter to have something in common, and it seemed like a last sentence in italics was the right choice. In these sentences, I try to sum up the feelings and changes each character has gone through, which is a bit difficult, I found!

As for the flashbacks, I was trying to show how the relationship deteriorated, and then I read over it, and I thought, "Wowww... Too much doom and gloom." So I added in a happy moment from the relationship, just to even the balance. There were many more flashbacks that I wanted to put in, but I didn't, because I was afraid that they would be confusing/overwhelming.

Thank you for reviewing my story! :)


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