Hello again, I can't believe I'm the first reviewer. But anyway.
You know how I said you've established James as a sort of everyman? You reinforce that with sentences like these:
Itís the kind of place which looks good, but you hate. To you, it has no real character, no sense of home.
I've never met anyone who didn't think like that before. That's a good thing, by the way. I don't know if it was intentional, but it's one of the things I really like about this story so far. It's about an ordinary guy from an extraordinary family, who goes on to try to save someone in a wholly different way to how his father did. (Okay, so that doesn't do it justice at all. Moving on swiftly...)
Speaking of characterisation, I'm glad you've decided to move away from the stock Next Gen characters: James is not some unholy compound of the bad side of James I and the good side of Sirius, and Hugo is not a mini-Ron. And Scorpius is nowhere to be seen! Your characterisation's a breath of fresh air in that respect.
I personally like the pace of the plot. I think it'd lose something of James' Jamesness if you sped it up; he doesn't seem like the kind of person to do things quickly. It also keeps the identity of your OC tantalisingly far away, which ratchets up the suspense (and therefore the interest of the reader!).
The theory that James is working on is very interesting... might I assume it is the same which is referred to in the italic-y bit in First? That you've mentioned it again is very effective - I very much want to know how that theory is going to affect a miscarriage of justice.
What I'm trying to say is, I really like this fic so far, and I'm surprised it hasn't got more reviews. Well done.
Author's Response: Hey there again! Glad to see you back! :D
He is totally ordinary, really. Well, perhaps a lot more intelligent than most people, but he makes up for that in other ways :P Haha, no seriously, it does sum it all up pretty nicely! :)
I know! That was part of my motivation to write this fic, because I got so bored of all the James/OC/Albus fics and all the ones where James is Quidditch Captain/prankster/etc. And that combination is utterly unholy, I agree ;) James is, in my mind at least, a lot more like his grandparents, with bits of his parents creeping in as well. He's a mix :) Hugo! I kinda love Hugo, lol. He's much more Hermione's son than Ron's, I think. At least, he seems to have turned out that was :P
James' Jamesness! Alliteration! :D Ahem, anyway, yeah I really struggle with writing fast-paced plots so I'm so glad you think the pace is all right. Ah, the identity of the OC will be revealed soon... ;)
It is the exactly the same theory! :) I'm so glad you noticed that! I wanted to include it because it really is a pretty major part of the story, and a lot of things happen to do with it and because of it and things ;) Haha, unfortunately you'll have to wait to find that out! Sorry!
Thank you so so much for this lovely review! I loved it! :D