|Review:||Athene Goodstrength says:|
Well, I just loved this. I haven't read many AU, but this one really grabbed me.
Your language and tone are just perfect, somewhat reminiscent of Rowling's writing. I really enjoy that in a fic at times, it makes it lovely to read. As you credited the USA edition of the book, I'm guessing you're American? Well, your language was very British, all the English idioms are employed perfectly. I likey!
I loved all the juicy little bits of info - Snape in jail, Lupin accused rather than Sirius, Harry's sibling's names, and I laughed out loud at Neville having 'his father's nose'.
Your characterization is great... I very much enjoyed the fact that some people never change - Draco Malfoy is still a bit nasty (although I do see a little vulnerability in his embarrassment at being interrupted that I find endearing - it's a reminder that although he's a snob, he's just an 11 year old boy at the moment!) and Ron would still be a slightly nervous kid who is kind enough to be willing to make friends with the strange, famous boy. I love Ron and Neville bonding over the loss of their pets!
I don't like Harry much here though, I suppose that's the point! I do hope that he turns out to be alright, really, as I think James and Lily would have brought him up well. But it's your story, and you've started it so brilliantly!
I found this so sad: "I donít like a bunch of children in my house. They're too loud. Be a good boy and go play with your chess set." I thought to myself, that's exactly what it would have been like for Neville if his parents had died. Then I remembered that he was brought up by his gran anyway, and that's probably what his childhood *was* like, and it made me feel so sad!
I really enjoyed this, can't wait for the next chapter!
Also... please tell me Pettigrew's been eaten. That would be perfect! Haha.
Author's Response: Oh wow, what a fantastic review!
Oooh, that's good to hear about the Britishisms! I try pretty hard with those.
Baww. Draco's so snobby but all the same, he's still just an eleven year old boy and I think that all of his nastiness was just really brought out by Harry (much like Snape's nastiness was brought out by James). I think Draco was just really jealous of Harry, so in this alternate universe, he wanted to attach himself to someone famous but then realized that if he wasn't going to be the dominant one, he didn't want anything to do with him. There's a reason why Crabbe and Goyle were his friends - they didn't speak up for themselves. They couldn't hog the spotlight.
I think that while Harry's kind of spoiled, it would sort of be expected because that's how his father was at that age. Plus, he's an eleven year old boy. He's still got plenty of maturing to do. We don't be seeing any of that, though, because this is only a one-shot. ^ ^
Neville's childhood probably wasn't very fun. :(
Yes, Pettigrew was eaten! He was an owl's breakfast and he shall be no more. Bahaha.
Thank you for reading and reviewing!