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Review:caoty says:
Hey, I'm here from the Gryffie common room.

I like your James. He's got a fun voice, and he's a great narrator with a hint of borderline-stalkerishness which is somehow cute rather than creepy, so well done on that.
He's a little bit... erm... clean?... and a bit sappy for a teenage boy, but I'll give you the benefit of the doubt on that one and say that his infatuation's addled his brains. xP

The story itself is adorable. D'awww, James making Lily smile. :3

One last thing before I go: your characters are a bit American, which is jarring, and your punctuation's not entirely perfect. Nothing a good proofread can't fix, but you know.

Author's Response: lol the teenage boys I knew, and the ones you know must be different :P at least when I was growing up. If you have any ideas how to make them sound less american, feel free to pm me, considering I am, and have only visited england twice, my experience is limited. The sandwich idea is something I got from having one in England, something my uncle made me, and treacle tart is completely english, not something we have over here.
Thanks for the advise, I'm glad you enjoyed it :)


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