Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:WitnesstoitAll says:
Hey!

So it really bothered me the other night that I had read this without leaving a review, and then I saw your name up in the review tag and decided I needed to pop over here and /actually/ leave one.

I know I told you I loved this one shot already, but I really really did. There was something incredibly powerful about the succint stlye of this one-shot --- like both in the length of it and in the pacing of your word choices. I loved the structure you chose to go with for this piece ... the counting and the four withing parentheses. Minerva is such a moving character -- strong when she has to be, but it was so lovely to be able to see her at a weak point or four. I recently read Susan's Minerva one shot, and it made me realize how strong of a characteristic love is in Minerva's character and you captured that facet of her here so, so well. I can't even begin to imagine how hard it would be to stand as the head of a house (the mother of a house?) that is so centrally involved in the war and to watch her students give up their lives to the the cause.

Gah. The last line was seriously just like bam! It really was the perfect ending to this one shot. Although I do have to say that I almost expected to read a /Five/ after the last line almost like a -fin- I'm not sure why but I figured I'd toss that out there.

All in all, this was a gorgeous one shot and I'm very glad that you decided to use this for your promo app.

xoxo
Mel

Author's Response: You know I don't mind! I just appreciated your feedback on helping me choose. But I am still thankful you did review, so thank you. :)

I was actually kind of worried because it was so short, and I'm sure you've noticed how I am not usually a writer of short one-shots. I'm wordy and superfluous, so this was definitely very different from me. The more I reread it, though, the happier I was with the outcome. People keep saying they wish I added more of this or that, but I don't know, I find it hard to think about adding anything else. I'm actually really happy with how this turned out and maybe this sounds egotistical or something but I don't think it needs anything else, at least from my standpoint, to get the point I wanted to across.

Gah, I know, I could not be in McGonagall's shoes. I know it's kind of like house-bias or whatever, but the Gryffindors are the house of the brave so it just seems kind of natural that they'd immerse themselves in the war and have the courage to stand up for what they believe in (not that I'm saying other houses wouldn't, but it just seems to characterize that house in particular) and especially since this is somewhat of a futuretake from PoC, it's easy to write the guilt that Minerva feels here because she's the one that recruited them in the first place to join the war efforts.

The last line gets everyone, I swear! You can thank Rachel for making me leave it as it was. Now that I've read the story a million times, I'm really happy with it as the last line. I think it leaves that sort of impact I was hoping for with this fic.

Hm, I can see where you're coming for with the five/fin thing. I thought about it, with Remus or something, but considering the time period I wrote this in, I didn't want to jump wars just for one section. I wasn't even sure at first with that last line if I should make mention of the second war, so like I said, you can thank Rachel for making me keep it. :P

I'm so glad you loved this as much as I loved writing it, and thanks again for providing your feedback in helping me choose with fics to use! You're wonderful. :)


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 441
Submit Report: