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Review:Jchrissy says:
This is screwed up, you obviously know that because you wrote it. Okay... where to start.

After I noticed your sentence structure, I went back to the beginning and read it like I would a poem. I actually think this could be turned into that really well and easily, then the unconventional sentences would be a bit easier to read. I don't think it was hard to read like this, though.

The idea of loving some one the way Tonks love him, and giving that person all of you, in trade for a shell of them, is so painful. You bring that pain out really clearly, and it makes me want to cry for her. Not being loved the way you know someone else is will always hurt, no matter the reason. She chooses to take him, knowing what she knows, and in this story I get the sense if the Battle of Hogwarts hadn't killed her, this would have (in the sense of heart, at least).

I love Remus to all ends, and you make me hate him in this. I don't pity his love for Sirius, I just hate him for what he is doing to Tonks, and not being a strong enough man to either get away from her and let her move on, or put everything behind and learn to love the woman he married completely, not just pathetically. So, you being able to make me so disgusted with Remus really shows the talent of this piece.

I don't even know if I want to touch on the ending. It's really is so horrible, but so compelling. The fact that she does if for him is a testimony to her fierce love and lack of self respect. I don't know if you meant to convey that ending one, but I view anyone that lets somebody take advantage of them the was Remus is, as having little self respect. Then I go back to feeling bad for her for loving him so much that she can't say no, and go back to hating him for putting her through that.

I still don't know what I think. I'm happy CambAngst posted a link to your piece, because I have never read anything close to it. You are a wonderful writer, I think the style of this story enhances it.

This is a poem that reminds me of your story (just the spastic pacing) I think you would like it, I'll post it for you in forums!

Author's Response: It really is screwed up. I'll take it as a compliment, though, because I made them all insane on purpose.

I'm bad at prose. I tend to write things that straddle the line between prose and poetry, and I had a rhythm in mind while I was writing this. And I have complete and utter disregard for appropriate sentence structure.

I always thought Remus and Tonks' marriage was doomed to fail. I love him an extraordinary amount, but I hated him so much in DH; DH!Remus isn't talked about too much in fic, and he was, quite frankly, deserving of an adjective which isn't 12+ by any stretch of the imagination. I was sort of glad he died by the end, really. (It breaks my heart to say it, but it's true.) So it makes me happy in a sort of sad way that you didn't find Remus sympathetic at all.

I did somewhat mean to convey Tonks' lack of self-respect: she's lost her identity within Remus at this point, she doesn't quite have a self to think of and look after. Remus not calling her by her name, but only referring to her as 'the woman he married', doesn't help either. And now I have to go read The Shoebox Project or something so I don't hate Remus forever.

Thank you so much for this review, my ego is roughly the size of this earth now. And ooh, poem. :)

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