Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:Aphoride says:
Hey there! Gosh, this was so cute! Very awkward, but so cute as well. It was really realistic as well - with the awkwardness and just the whole scenario with Molly asking Arthur out. You really captured what she would be feeling as she asked him out, how nervous she would be and everything. I also like how you included the beliefs of the time - that girls shouldn't ask guys out really - because this would have happened in the sixties and everything, so it would have been a pretty different time. So many people forget that, so kudos to you for remembering! ;)

I really liked your characterisation of Molly and Arthur. They both seemed pretty close to their older canon counterparts, you know, with Molly having grown up and being more secure than she was here. You managed to show the characters younger with similar traits and personalities, while still allowing them room to grow later on, which I liked.

I did think, though, that it was a little short - even for a one-shot. If you added in more description - showing us what happens, Clara's thoughts and Molly's reactions and things, describing the scene around them - it would be longer and just feel a bit more alive, you know? Grammar-wise, though, I couldn't see anything which threw me off the story, which was lovely :D

Seriously, I really enjoyed this. It was so cute and sweet - and I can definitely imagine it happening! Keep going! :D

Aph xx

Author's Response: Thanks so much for your review. I'm so glad you think they are pretty similar to thier canon counterparts. Rereading the story, I see what you mean about adding more description.
Mystique


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 796
Submit Report: