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Review:BoOkWoRm24 says:
Hi so I thought this was an interesting peice.

You're imagery was great here. The scene was very dramatic and intense. I could really feel Lily's pain and suffering here.

It was different seeing that it was Remus at the end reather than James. That's who I thought it was through out the entire thing then when I found it was actually Remus I was very suprised, but not unhappy. Her emotions seemed so strong for him that it felt ok that it wasn't James. My one thing here was that you said this was a Lily/James and a Lily/Remus in the story description. I didn't pick up on any spot where James was even mentioned in here so the summary was a bit misleading.

I also saw a few grammatical errors here and there for example, "peircing threw the retched calls..." should be through in stead of threw. Just a few little things like that. Nothing a once over shouldn't be able to fix.

Anyway great story hope to catch you again in another BvB battle


Author's Response: Hey! Thanks so much for the review! James is the character in the beginning who slapped her, but it really wasn't that clear. I will fix the typo right away! :) Thanks for your help, and the lovely review! :)

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