Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:CambAngst says:
A very interesting start to what seems like a very interesting story.

Remus and Tonks are one of my favorite ships to read because we know so very little about their relationship from the books. There's a ton of room to explore and expand and easily stay completely canon-compliant.

I really liked Tonks's report to the Order. She's the kind of girl you just want to love like a little sister, precisely because you know that it will annoy her. Clearly some of her younger Auror colleagues feel that way about her, and apparently at least one has feelings that are a bit creepier. Ewww...

You did a great job setting up her relationship with Moody and with Snape. Even though his role in this is small, I liked what you did with Snape in general, making him abrasive and unfriendly to the others. Moody comes across like the world's scariest uncle.

Remus's report was a very interesting take on the social dynamics within a werewolf pack. I thought you did a great job of building this up and setting the scene. You also do a fantastic job of engendering sympathy for Remus. You make it clear that he doesn't really fit into either world.

Let's see, what else? You introduce some new OC's as well as characters from canon whose role was never defined in the books, like Amelia Bones. I like that you don't seem to be afraid to experiment a bit, and fill in gaps with your own insight and intuition.

Everything flowed very smoothly in your writing. Your narrative and dialog felt really natural, nothing was forced or artificial-sounding. You mix up your word choice and sentence structure nicely, so your writing doesn't sound flat or sing-songy.

This was a very interesting first chapter, and I find myself wanting to read more...

Author's Response: Hello :)

Thank you very much :) You've really understood my intention of making Tonks seem like a younger sibling. In my mind, the Order are all slightly protective of her - especially Moody and her collegues. Yes, Vincent is a little... creepy? :P

Remus never seems comfortable to me in the books; he's always an outcast. I'm so glad that this came across well! :)

Thank you so much for such as lovely review and for reading one of my stories! :)


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 296
Submit Report: