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Review:bri_5_stars says:
Meep! This is a very cute moment, and you've got a lot of potential I think. You've got all of the elements of a good one shot/story, it just seems like it could use a little pizzazz or heart. The descriptions are great, its just a bit more telling than showing. We don't need to know each and every guest, or every bit of the past; just anything that is essential to setting the wedding scene. I found no spelling errors, and nothing that stuck out on the grammar front, to which I must say 'bravo'! Anywho, I hope that didn't sound mean. Good job, and happy writings in the next weddings!
-bri

Author's Response: Thanks! I'm actually in the process of writing a 'Harry' piece with more about the actual wedding in it. I didn't really like it either (a little editing to be done, I think!) Thanks so much for reviewing and I'd love to take a look at some of your own work! x

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