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Review:momotwins says:
I love your characterization of young McGonagall. She's so sad and brave and lonely. Wearing her hair pulled tightly back just suits her so well. Love Dumbledore as a teacher, encouraging young Minerva. Love the canon touches of Anti-Cheating Quills and alphabetical seat assignments and dragon pox. I love little details like that, they really make the story come alive.

I didn't see why Frances was crying. She started it, said something horrible to her sister, and managed to get something of a rise out of her but Minerva didn't respond in kind. As I saw that exchange, Frances was entirely at fault. She acted like a jerk, frankly. Carolyn's berating Minerva seemed out of place, even given the loss of her sister. One would think she'd be mad at Frances for picking on Minerva.

There were a few grammatical errors and misused words, but overall it's quite a well-written story. I really liked your take on McGonagall and the overall tone of the story. Very nicely done!

Author's Response: So sad and brave and lonely - very Minerva. And the canon bits! Teacher Dumbledore I loved - I prefer him as Professor rather than Headmaster, actually. I love those little details most people overlook, too.
Oh, yes, I suppose Carolyn being mad at Frances would make better sense, wouldn't it? She did act like a bit of a jerk, but not all families can be perfect.
Thank you very much for reviewing this!


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