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Review:CambAngst says:
Hey, Beeezie!

This was really lovely. From beginning to end, you captured all of the warm, earthy little details of Teddy and Victoire's life together. They seem like such a perfectly matched couple in this story. I absolutely adore it because it's rather uncommon around here. Not all fan fic has to be teen-angsty and riddled with conflict and despair. This was just a nice, pleasant day shared by two people who love each other that had an unexpectedly (at least for Victoire) significant and happy end.

From the outset, I liked the casual atmosphere that you created between the two of them. They've been living together for long enough that small things like broken glasses and interrupted sleep don't cause any major friction. At the same time, they still have that infatuation with one another. They're both madly in love and it was really fun to read.

Teddy's visit to Diagon Alley was nicely written. There were familiar touches of the magical world mixed in with some distinctly non-magical elements that I found refreshing. I think it made perfect sense to think that Teddy and his grandmother would both err a bit on the paranoid side, considering the losses that their family suffered. I liked his elderly landlord, although I was a bit confused as to why her desk and floo room were concealed behind a magical concrete wall as opposed to being, say, in her unit. Not a big deal, but it gave me a little pause while I was reading. I also felt unsure about why she would ever be presented with the choice between dying and giving up her own free floo powder.

I appreciated Teddy's distaste for unnecessary enchantments on his baked goods. It seemed like such a sensible stance to take, and Teddy seems quite sensible to me. At the same time, the enchantments on the flowers to make them last and, you know, not poison anyone seemed wholly sensible and I really wish my local florist offered that.

Lastly, I was a huge fan of the way that you wrote Victoire's reaction to Teddy's proposal. It's so tempting to just write that cliche response where the bride-to-be squeals and falls into her lover's arms, chanting "Yes, yes, yes!" I thought Victoire's reaction was far more realistic for a person who was "surprised but not really surprised" -- did that make sense? -- by an engagement proposal. It's often a bit of an awkward moment as the recipient, even though they may be thrilled, comes to grips with what the answer really means. Her follow-up reaction, "Oh my god. Im engaged" was so spot-on to what I think most people experience.

Suggestions? I don't have a whole lot. You touched very briefly on Teddy's parents when you were explaining why he locks his door with a key. I think maybe he would have ruminated just a bit on what it would have meant to him to have been able to tell his parents that he was engaged. Would he have approached things any differently? I would have been interested to read your take on his feelings on not being able to share this huge milestone with them.

Your writing was beautiful. Everything flowed very nicely and there were no typos or grammar problems that I could see. You have a real knack for this pairing!

Author's Response: Hey! :) Thanks for coming by to review!

Re: Teddy's landlady - the floo fireplace is basically like a lobby. People can use it at all hours. She's there during the day, but one can use it at night as well, which is why it's not in her unit. She's never going to actually be presented with the choice of dying or giving up the floo powder - it's just a phrase. :)

I really, really wish my local florist offered non-poisonous poison flowers, too! I adore foxgloves, but sadly I have too much sense to own them, especially with my pets. :( I also agree about the enchantments on baked goods - it just seems like such an unnecessary wizard thing, kind of like apparating two feet. :P

I'm really glad you liked the way Victoire reacted - I try to keep my characters as realistic as possible, so I'm always happy to hear that I succeeded, especially where cliches tend to take over. :P I can see what you mean with Teddy thinking about his parents, and I'll try and edit in a mention of something along those lines. :)

Thank you so much! I'm really glad you enjoyed this!


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