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Review:Kwan says:
Well written, if not a bit sad, fic. Lupin has always been one of my favorite characters and I think you capture his anguish well as he grieves for his friends.

It flows well, but I think it's just a bit too straight forward. Nothing really pops out at me as incredibly moving. It's as if I'm watching his life through a series of slides and I don't feel the connection to the little anecdotes as he passes through Hogwarts. Perhaps a more descriptive approach that really highlights key areas of each Maurader's personalities would have helped me connect more.

It's more important that even though Lupin has these feelings with these memories, you have to make them more than just a fleeting memory. That way, the story is something to remember rather than just a flash of sadness that quickly fades away.

I hope that didn't sound too critical as there's nothing wrong with this story. I just had some suggestions for you to think about while you write your next piece.

Keep on writing and enjoy!

Author's Response: I understand what you mean, by saying that it is straight forward, and it could have been more descriptive. I will keep that in mind when I write more.

AndI agree with you, into making the memories more than just memories. I will trybto work with that.

And no probelm, I like critical,there is no way I can get better if no one helps me by telling me what to change.

Thams(:
~Sarah
Xx


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