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Review:classicblack says:
Well with a bit of revising (mostly some serious grammar/ conventions help) along with learning how to make separate paragraphs, it just might be an okay story.
Congratulations on coming so far!!
Happy writing,
classicblack

Author's Response: Heheh, I like to think that I can now spell Voldemort -facepalm- and Lily so at least one thing's improved. It really is bizaree to look at xD

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