Overall, I thought it well executed. Not only did you tell it from Peter's POV but you managed to imbue so much life into Bellatrix and Narcissa. Your descriptions were amazing and the analogies were fascinating. Peter is a person that i don't like reading too often because he is cowardly and beneath my shoe, but how he is portrayed here in the beginning, he's got some loyalty. There's the underlying grossness to him, but still some loyalty.
I did find one typo: [waring] the most prefect of disguises - wearing
Peter's fascination with Bellatrix poked at me. It was a thought I'd not thought before but one that stuck with me. Because she would be the type of person he would be fascinated with--someone with power. Narcissa and Severus, that implication mind-boggled me too!
In terms of something that would pull this together more than it already is? The ending got a little muddled. I hadn't realized that Bella had picked Peter up and I wasn't sure if Peter was being tortured in the end when he, I guess, decided to join the "bad" side? That's all I could give you on that.
Other than that, the suspense you kept me in was brilliant and I really mainly chose to read this one because you had the Master on the banner :P Otherwise, Peter and I don't get along too well :) But as always, I love your writing style!
Author's Response: Thank you very much for reading and reviewing this story! It isn't the average kind of story, and certainly not everyone's cup of tea, so it means a lot that you still liked it. :D Peter is an incredibly difficult character to write because, even though I don't hate him and want to give him an equal chance in fanfiction, I still can't hide a slight disgust for him. His animal was a rat - that can't say too much in his favour, unfortunately, because we're too hard-wired to see rats as a plague and harbingers of death. JKR purposely makes it hard to see the good in him, which of course makes Harry's defence of Peter all the more extraordinary, making Harry more of the hero.
Thank you for pointing out that typo, by the way, and also for discussing the ending. It's been the sticky part of the story for me, and I've struggled to decide whether to be more explicit and increase the rating, or keep it abstract and mystify readers. I have now made the edits and upped the rating so that readers can more clearly see how Peter broke his silence. He's not strong enough to withstand Bellatrix and he knows it, that's partially why he's so drawn to her, like the moth to the flame.
She has enough similarities to Sirius in her reckless, impassioned behaviour, so if Peter is drawn to Sirius, then in my head, at least, it makes sense that Bella would also be an object of his interest. I'm glad that part of the story stuck with you. ;) Being able to include the two sisters in this story made writing it so much more interesting because I'd never done much with them before, and here, we get to see them not only together, but also in private.