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Review:Janner says:
The first thing you need to do is edit the chapter and reduce the spaces between the paragraphs. It makes it a little hard to read.

I look forward to you developing the relationship between Molly and Noah. He's obviously unsure how to handle her when she's grumpy. I get the impression that,deep down, she's jealous of Victoire/Teddy.

No major issues with spelling/grammar, which is always nice to see. I would suggest one change "she bit her tongue from arguing" doesn't really scan for me.
Prhaps 'she bit her tongue to stop herself arguing with him.'

A good start, looking forward to more.

Author's Response: Thank you for the review! :) About the spacing, I don't know what is going on with it because In word there are two spaces (as we are told to do) but it comes up like this. I can see if re-editing it will help it out now that it has been posted, but that is just how it appeared once it was published.

As for Molly and Noah, that is something that is definitely answered within the next chapter or two. This story doesn't focus much on relationships as hardcore as others would, but it is a prominent aspect.

Thank you very much for the review! It is greatly appreciated and it helps the motivation! :)


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