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Review:watchoutfornargles says:
Hi :) In your first paragraph I would try combining some of your sentences because they are kind of short and choppy. This part of the next paragraph "Ron was not there, Ron was dead. She had witnessed with her own eyes the Death Eater called Scabior hit him with the green light of the killing curse. " can be changed to "Ron wasn't there, he was dad. She had witnessed with her own eyes when the Death Eater called Scabior hit him with the green light of the killing curse." You also spelled prophecy wrong. You also don't need quotation marks when you say 'as my equal.' Take out "I can tell you" before "they have left..." There is not apostrophe in Weasleys. I really liked the idea of the story, even if it wasn't canon, and I hope I wasn't too harsh.

Author's Response: No you weren't too harsh, I don't mind constructive criticism, even if I don't neccessarily agree with it. I take your points on board. Spellcheck seems to accept both versions of 'prophe(c/s)y.

I'm going to do a cheeky review of your review.
'Ron was not there, he was DAD.' Hmmm.

Thanks for taking the time to review.


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