I normally love it when people give me a whole host of things to look at when they request a review. It makes reviewing a lot easier and it gives structure to my reviews, which means I'm less likely to go off on a few hundred tangents like I tend to do.
You gave me a whole list. And, for once, I am going to ignore the list. I kind of feel like I don't want to dissect this story. I don't want to break it down into its individual components and analyse it from every angle. I think it will take away the beauty of this story. I really like how you have written this and I don't want to go all scientific on it. Rather, I just want to write my thoughts on it. And, yes, that may well may result in me rambling.
I have this thing. I loves stories that are set outside. I don't know what it is, but I have a small obsession with how an outdoors setting can just... bring this serenity to a story. I don't know how to explain it. But when I read this, I could feel some adrenaline when James and Sirius were running, I could see why Harry would get cold and why Lily would need a beanie, I can feel Lily's sadness. It's the outdoors setting that does it. Especially at night. It's like the night just brings out emotions and if the writer can do it well, all I can do is sigh when I read their story.
I was sighing a lot when I read this.
It's a very simple story. There really isn't much in it. But I think that the best stories are the simple ones. I love one-shots that are just a small glimpse into someone's life, a snapshot into what they are doing, thinking and feeling. I think that is what you have here. And it's short, simple, sweet but very endearing to read.
What I love most is the way you establish the relationships in so few words. Yes, we know that James and Sirius are best friends. But they just have this... ease about them. If you replaced them with original characters, I could still see just how comfortable they were with each other. Their friendship comes across very clearly.
James and Lily are also beautifully done in this. I can see how James is concerned and worried about Lily and little Harry and you, again, write it so well. It makes sense that James would think about how he points the stars out to Harry because he is a father now, and Harry is one of his top priorities. You do it in so few words. I'm really jealous.
I also love the idea that they are both looking at the stars. Ignoring the fact that I love how we are all connected by the same night sky, it was just a lovely way to tie the entire story together. Especially when Lily conjours her patronus, that's so sad but loving at the same time. It's sad, yes, but also hopeful as well. It's like both of them are always going to be joined. Which can sound a little bit too fluffy, but it's just such a sweet idea.
This was so... delicate. I don't know how to explain it. It was just beautiful. The way you wrote about it being outdoors, the friendship between James and Sirius, the love between James and Lily and Harry, it was just... really, really lovely to read.
Author's Response: I cannot describe how much I love you for this. To hear that my writing comes across exactly the way I wanted it to, is amazing. I'm thrilled that you got the sense of the different relationships between the characters and that they came across as I hoped they would. That they'd seem real, and complex and yet everything is so simple and basic at the same time.
And I totally agree. Outdoor settings give so much freedom to a writer, to a scene and to an idea. Does that even make sense? Probably not, but oh well.
As I said before, I cannot explain how absolutely thrilled I am at how much you liked this piece. Thank you, thank you, thank you for taking the time to review this for me (and so quickly!) it means so much to hear feedback such as this.