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Review:Cassius Alcinder says:
I'm here from the forums with your review!

So I know one of your concerns was the lack of reads, and i can tell you that that has nothing to do with the quality of your writing. I've observed that read counts seem to be primarily based on characters and ships in the story rather than the quality of the story (which is why every terrible dramione still gets loads of reads). So the lack of reads is simply because Moody isn't a very popular character, which is a shame because I think he's awesome.

Moving on to characterization, I think you nailed him perfectly. You really portrayed his caution, his paranoia, his determination, loyalty, and incorruptibility. It seemed just like the man e know from the books, but with a little more depth since hie's the MC now.

I think this chapter does work well as a prelude; it gives us a strong introduction to his character and why he is in his current situation. It was good to end with the part about accepting the hogwarts post, it gives us a hook to keep reading and places it within the context of the books.

Overall I think this is a great start and a great depiction of a very underrated character.

Author's Response: Thanks so much for taking my request, I really appreciate it!

Thanks a million for all your feed-back. It has put me at ease a bit. It's just hard to judge your own story, especially if it isn't getting read/reviewed a lot at all. There is always that little voice in the back of your mind (or my mind anyway!) telling you it's rubbish. So it's hard to know if it's good or not. I was slightly apprehensive about this to be honest because I'd never done Moody before. That, and I had originally written this as a one-shot, but my friend said that it was a bit too long to be a one-shot, so that's why I divided into the prelude and then the actual ambush.

I was a bit worried that the prelude was rubbish because this story isn't getting read at all and the prelude has the bulk of the reads, not chapter two, so it looked like people were just reading the prelude and then giving up, which made me think that maybe there was something wrong with it, (which was disappointing for me because I really feel like chapter two is the more exciting and entertaining chapter). But all that aside, now you've put me at ease about this prelude - so thank you, it really is a relief to hear that you enjoyed this :)

I understand what you mean about the popular ships/characters getting all the reads. I HATE Dramione myself. I do think though that sometimes the underrated characters make the best fan-fiction. I read a one-shot about Beedle the Bard and I swear it's probably the best I've ever read, but so few people have read it because it's about Beedle and they are really missing out. Ah well, that's how things go really, it's just the way things are!

I agree with you too, I think Moody is awesome and I really had a lot of fun writing him, so I am glad you thought it was good!

Thanks so much for the review! I really appreciate it, hope you like chapter two now! Thanks again :)


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