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Review:Roots in Water says:
It's Roots in Water here with your review!

What a cliff hanger! I think that you did a great job with this chapter- the flashbacks fit smoothly into the present day and you split them into pieces that made sense with the present day situation.

Once again I think that your characterization was very good- Tonks was very youthful in this chapter, stubborn and clumsy, just like in the books. It was interesting to see Moody's protective nature highlighted again- will you eventually explain the reasons behind it as it doesn't seem that Moody treats all of the young Aurors in that fashion. And ug- you made Vincent even worse in this chapter! In the last chapter it just seemed that he was a guy with a very serious crush on Tonks but he was plain creepy here! "I'm always here."... It's a very good thing that the other Aurors are looking out for her- the switch in patrols was very nice given the situation.

I liked the detail you put into describing the Auror office- they made sense and added to the realism of the story. The little detail about the family photos was particularly well done- it makes sense for them to hide any ouvert connections to their loved ones to protect them from danger. As well, the flow was very nice- it was smooth and you related your paragraphs very well. This was particularly evident with your flashbacks, as I mentioned before.

I noticed that there are some occasions where you still didn't capitalize words where they should be, such as with "for Merlinís sake" (it should be "For"). I would just do a quick read through of your chapters and wherever there's the beginning of a sentence you should capitalize it. As well, with "looked over. Their eyes narrowing" I would either change the period to a comma or change "narrowing" to "narrowed".

I think that it's a very good idea that Tonks volunteered- as Dumbledore said, her situation makes her ideal for the job. I don't know how anyone else would have managed to imitate a werewolf without metamorphagus abilities. You've obviously put thought into this- the freezing spell will ensure that she doesn't blow her cover with her emotions.

All in all, I think that you're doing a great job with the continuation of this story and capturing the reader's interest. Thanks for requesting a review and I hope that my comments are helpful!

Author's Response: Hello :)

Thanks :) I've never been sure about flashbacks so really hoped they fit in!

Moody :D He's always fun to write! I've always wondered about their relationship so you will definetely see the reasons behind it! :D (If you keep reading of course :P) Vincent - I have plans for Vincent (mwahaha ;) ) - he was never originally that bad in the slightest but as I was writing the chapter he seemed to take on a personality of his own! :P

Thanks for pointing out the errors. I must have missed them! ANd I have an issue with my tenses so I'll go correct them now :D

Your reviews are great and the errors have been very helpful :) Thank you very much :D

Keira :)



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