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Review:Chocolate_Frog says:
Ooh, a Tom/Minerva love story. I haven't really read a lot of them, so we'll see how this goes.

I think you started off pretty well, with the reminiscent tone of McGonagall leading up to the flashback. Judging from your summary, I'm guessing the Hogwarts students had all been evacuated to a host house because of World War II? This provides an interesting, more plausible setting for Tom and Minerva to bond (since I doubt a Gryffindor and Slytherin at that time would really be friends at Hogwarts), however, it doesn't seem plausible. Wouldn't Hogwarts be safer for them, with all the protection spells and the unplottable castle? Why would they need to be relocated? And if all the Hogwarts students were being relocated to one house, how come there's a little girl there? (Unless Rose is a first year?) Oh, and one more thing; let's say there's a good reason for them to be relocated--wouldn't the professors be on constant watch over them for their safety, and not let students wander around the grounds after curfew? Sorry if you think I'm too nit-picky, but though a bit of mystery is always welcome, loopholes are another thing, and would need to be properly explained in order to make your story believable. It's a nice concept though, and if there were some more explanations added in I think you'd be able to pull it off rather well. :)

Oh, a bit of foreshadowing there in the end with the blood. (This safe house doesn't seem so safe...?) Is it Rose who is hurt (sneaking a peek at the next chapter title), or something else? Now I'm really curious. xD

I noticed a few grammar errors in this (Like bouts of Random Capitalizing such as in 'The Young Girl' and 'The Slytherin Prince', as well as weird spacing and incorrect use of punctuation in dialogue), so you might want to do a quick edit to brush up some mistakes, or even enlist the help of a Beta. It'd greatly help the flow of the story.

Overall, it was a great story, and feel free to re-request if you want! (By the way, I apologize for the lateness of this one.) ^^

~Chocolate_Frog

Author's Response: Thank you for such an amazing & lengthy review!

Yeah, it is explained in later chapters why they moved from Hogwarts (within the next three/four chapter most likely) Rose is a first year and Minerva's cousin.

Good point about the teachers. That never even crossed my mind. Thanks for pointing that out! I'll defiantly go back and edit that.

Grammar is my absolute weakness; I'm terrible at it. I may get another beta if I can ever be bothered.

Thank you again! Don't worry about the lateless; it doesn't bother me
Jaz


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